The Little Things

As I begin to alter my life and build a career I'm starting to realize what's really important. And honestly, it really is the little things. Starting college in January isn't that exciting for me because I hate school, but learning and deciding what to do for the rest of my life, now that's exciting. With everything I've accomplished through out my life, I've got a free ride to any university in Utah. ( Of course I'm taking the cheapest one :p )  It's been super stressful this past month now that I'm working. I've been having to decide what I want to go to school for. Really? Decide what you want to do for the rest of your life. I've looked into a few things. Cosmetology has always been a passion, my mom traveled to New York and did models hair for a fashion show once, and that sounds like a dream right there. Making people feel beautiful about themselves inside and out, developing a bond with people that's unique, and being able to be myself and enjoy what I do. But lets face the truth, since I'm stuck in Utah I'm not going to make bank. So I've been thinking of maybe a kindergarten teacher. Four years of school and 40,000 a year. Ehh, not the greatest but a step up from cosmetologist. I asked Derrick his opinion on this and his advice was do something I love. After I told him how much I'd make he said we'd be more than comfortable with money. But now I'm looking into radiology because honestly watching 20 to 30 snot nose Mormon kids does not sound like my idea of a wonderful life career.  That bumps me up to 60,000 a year minimum. I like that a lot more (: Just the fact I have the option to debate what I want to be for the rest of my life makes me beyond ecstatic. Something I never thought I'd have the option to do. Maybe that's not so little but it is something I am beyond grateful for. (: 

Having a beautiful daughter who loves and cherishes me. Some women will never feel the love of a child, for that I am sorry. The love of a child is the greatest love I've ever felt. It goes deeper than the love of family, friends and spouses. She is my everything.

Another one of those absolutely amazing things in my life is Derrick. Not only has this man shown me compassion and supported me in any decision I make, he's loved my little girl like no ones business. The way he treats not only me, but her, never ceases to amaze me. From the late night talks about nothing at all to McFlurry's and Movies and laying on my car watching the stars, keeping each other warm and safe this man has shown me true love and compassion.

I have so many things in my life that I look over daily. Like my clear Italian skin. That isn't nasty and oily. I don't have to cake on make up to look beautiful. Unlike some people I know, I have natural beauty.
I have some damn amazing curves (; men don't like bones. they like girls with a nice ass and some nice curves. A girl who can get down and and actually wrestle. Men don't want a girl they're scared they're going to break. They don't want a little girl who's insecure with herself so she has to skip meals.
Thanks to my dad I've got some of the greenest eyes around. They aren't typical blue and they aren't shit brown. Friends envy them, men get lost in them, and I love them! So does Derrick. (;
I've got wonderful dogs who know when to give me kisses and when to play to make me laugh. they entertain Brielle when I can't and they are truly mine and Derricks best friends

I've got two of the greatest friends. That's all the friends I need. I don't need a bunch of people to compliment me and feel sorry for me to make my life okay. I only need two genuine friends. The ones who will tell me if that dress makes me look fat, or if I got some toilet paper stuck to my shoes. Kathy and Benji. Kat is giving me a little niece and I can't wait! Ben is always there and never lets me down.

I didn't leave high school the most popular girl in school. I'm not concided nor do I think myself better than everyone. Yes, I'm a fairly average person. Yes, I'm genuinely  kind hearted. Yes, I have insecurities but I don't let them control my life. That doens't make me better than you, and that doesn't make you better than me.
Peonie, get over youself.