Happy Thanksgiving!!

To start off I want to tell you guys how wonderful (yet different) of a Thanksgiving this was. This was my first Thanksgiving with my daughter (her dad had her last year) and my first Thanksgiving with Derrick. It was amazing.

The morning started off with Brielle sleeping in until nine. Derrick and I just laid in bed in each others arms just talking, looking up funny YouTube videos, and playing with our two dogs. Once Brielle finally woke up Derrick and I picked up the house and all sat down to eat breakfast. Maria's (Derrick's mom) had asked me to make a dessert. So I made Cinnamon cheesecake bites because it's the one thing I've always made with out doing something wrong to it. Derrick really wanted to help so he beat the cream cheese and sugar together and then him and Brielle licked the spoon and bowl. Super important part in cooking this dessert (; We all started getting spruced up for the day. Brielle got curly pigtails and while I was putting on my make up I learned my hair is long enough to pull all of it up! Finally!

After we got ready we headed to Maria's house. Brielle was immediately taken from me and I was forced to sit down and eat right then and there. His parents are so sweet :p It was a typical Thanksgiving: turkey, stuffing, rolls, salad, sweet potato's, etc. and then some super yummy chili that was surprisingly not too spicy.

I went back four or five times to get more :p It was soo good! Maria gave me a margarita which was actually a lot stronger than I thought it would be. I don't mind!The party really started when Aunt Lisa showed up. I have never seen two women fight over a baby like they fought over Brielle. One minute Maria would have her and the next Lisa was stealing her away! I now have to do joint babysitting custody with them :p Lisa also brought wine! Normally when I go to my parents it's very schedule like. Dinner is at a specific time, dessert is served at a specific time and board games are right after dessert. I never really like it that way but my Grandparents are old fashioned and a tad Mormon so alcohol is never allowed. But Lisa was handing me glasses left and right saying "hurry up and drink this!" By the time we left I was saying I haven't quite mastered walking in heels drunk :p

Not the greatest of pictures but Margarita on the left and Blush Sunset on the right.

Brielle enjoyed her food :p

Great grandpa!

Playing with Lilly's toys and sitting in her Brielle sized chair!

I hate when people "bet" me. It drives me crazy and I feel like I HAVE to prove them wrong! So Derrick said I bet you can't stand on one foot partially drunk in those shoes. After about five or six attempts I succeeded! :D

After a scrumdiliumpcious dinner we were tired and all three of us passed out on the couch. I was laying on Derricks chest with his arms around me, Brielle was laying on my chest with my arms around her and Zorro was laying on Brielle. I wish we could have got a picture of that! (:

Second part of this post, since it is THANKSgiving, I wanna let you know all of the things I'm thankful for.

First thing and above most I'm beyond thankful for my daughter. As little as she is and naive she has made me stronger and a better person. I stood up to someone deceiving not only me but their wife. I lost everything I had to keep my little girl safe. I sobered up. I have been sober for about two years now. I've learned to forgive. My adopted parents. My real mom. And myself. Some people call me a slut or a bad person for having a daughter at such a young age, but honestly without her I'd be one more hood rat on the street. She's changed my life forever. (: <3

Next thing, Derrick. The man who has seen me at some of my worst emotional times and some of my happiest times in my life. He's showed me love, compassion, and a solid relationship. I don't care our friends call us lame because we're the "married" couple. We have each other and any spare time we get should be filled with the other. He completes me. He knows things I don't even think my therapist knows. We've had a rough patch or two (over the same issue) and we've come out stronger every time. Through the late night terrors to the burnt dinners this man loves me and my daughter. He's had an open heart and allowed me in even after some one's hurt him severely. Lately we've been talking about babies and rings and our friends all getting married, and it makes me happy that I'm not scared of that commitment anymore. I love this man more than words can explain, he's shown me the true meaning of love, and he's been a wonderful boyfriend/stepdad. I'm glad he's mine and only mine.

Tuff Coco Puff :p love you. To my family out in Florida and Texas. I love you guys soooo much it's ridiculous. Brian my dad, I don't care what that paternity test said, you are my dad. You have been since I was born. The only person who fought for me. You never walked out. You tried your hardest to stay in my life. I blame Michelle for us losing contact. Seeing you last Christmas meant so much to me. I think of you and the family daily. I look at our pictures and I'm astounded at how much Brielle looks like you and Chelsey. I can't wait for you guys to come to Utah so I can show you My town. You can take the girl out of the country but you can't take the country out of a girl. I'm still your country bunken (or did Michelle call me that?) Joshy boy! I'm thankful to be able to call you my brother, momma may not have raised us right but she sure did make some good lookin' kids! I miss you and love you. And to my dearest Emily, I'm thankful for the memories I have with you. Most of my childhood memories consist of us playing in a Barbie Jeep and watching the meteor showers. I love you little sis, I wish I knew where ya were. <3

Thankful for my dogs! The only people who know how to shut up when I'm in serious need of grieving!

I'm thankful for everyone who's entered my life and touched my heart in some way. Everything happens for a reason. Move on, forget, and let yourself live. Learn to forgive the unforgivable. Let go of the hate and you'll notice how much happier you are.

The holiday's always make me want to soul search. Bare with me this next month :p

I love you all.